Aka, Beliefs: Round 2
Yes, back to beliefs again.
Your mind is a powerful tool. Use it for good.
Use it to the best of its ability, and use it to grow, so you can be of maximum value to the world.
Here’s how.Do you ever catch yourself saying self-limiting things like:
- What’s the use?
- I’ll never make it
- There’s no point
- It won’t make a difference
- I’m too slow
- I’m too stupid (etc, etc)
- It’s too much work
Even when deep down, you wish you COULD, or wish you had a little cheerleader? Here’s a little story about cheerleaders… when I was running regularly, usually at 5am or so (by which I mean, sometimes earlier) because the summer heat of Taipei rises to absurdly high levels by 6am, of COURSE I would get tired and discouraged when training for my half-marathons.
Training sucked. Early mornings, so I had early nights. Training means there are no aid stations, no friends and family on the sidelines cheering you on or passing you sports drinks. No distance markers. No finish line. No medal.
Those hot summer mornings, when the heat rose with the sun, the chorus of cicadas also rose to deafening levels. At first, I found it annoying. They sing louder as it gets hotter, to stay cool, so it was a sign of how goddamn hot it was, and there I was, out pounding the pavement all alone.
One morning, I suppose after the endorphins kicked in, I found myself grinning at the sound of the cicadas. I decided they were like my little cheerleaders. So even though I was out there alone, no finisher medal to be had, the cicadas were ramping up their song and cheering me on even as the heat and the scorching sun rose.
Did anything change in my environment? No. Did I recruit anyone or anything outside of me to cheer me on? No. I DECIDED to use the cicada song, the signal of rising heat, to cheer me on. Which means, really, that I was cheering myself on. So from that moment on, I felt encouraged every time I heard them, until I began to cheer myself on too.
That’s all it takes. One moment, one decision.Britt Lao
Rewrite your internal dialogue. Catch yourself. And choose again.
One time, visiting family, my mom was familiarizing herself with her new camera, and practicing taking pictures of wake boats speeding by on the lake. The tricky part was, there is a large tree smack in the middle of the view, meaning the shot can only be taken on either side of the tree.
As she raced from one window to another, she visibly slowed down and said something along the lines of, “Oh, I’ll never make it.” To which I replied, “Well, not with THAT attitude!” Everyone looked a little startled, and laughed.
But it’s true.
If you decide you aren’t going to get the shot, you’re NOT.
If you decide you ARE going to get the shot, maybe you will, and HEY, isn’t that a better chance than not even trying at all? And by continuing to practice success, your chances are only going to improve. But how can you expect to get any success when you give up when you’re only halfway there?
I don’t know if my mom thought maybe she looked silly racing from one side of the house to the other, and got self-conscious. That happens to a lot of us, if not everybody. But one thing I learned in my stint as a kindergarten teacher was, it’s okay to look silly, and it’s great to laugh at yourself. People will laugh with you. We need more fun, joy, and lightheartedness in our lives. We WERE cheering on my mom as she tried to get that shot of the speedboat, and who cares if she looked silly or not? It was fun, and even had a purpose:
to improve her photography skills! Never mind that all that racing back and forth is good exercise, too 😉
So, be a cheerleader. Cheer on others and encourage them to try their best, to stand up again after they trip and fall.
And remember to do the same for yourself, when it feels like no one else is even watching or caring about your progress. Maybe it even feels like there are more people hoping that you’ll fall.
Let me tell you, the haters are typically louder than the supporters. Nowhere is this easier to see than in online reviews (Yelp, Google, and TripAdvisor for example). Angry people, the haters, are more likely to be vocal than the people who like you, who like what you offer the world, and who want you to succeed.
That gets to change. That doesn’t have to be a reality anymore. Like someone’s business? Tell them. Appreciate your neighbour’s flower garden that brightens your day? Tell them. Some kid skipping down the sidewalk puts a smile on your face? Tell them they just made your day!
Because what we don’t see, is the internal dialogue, the day the gardener decides not to replant the bulbs, the business owner feels too discouraged and like no one values their services, the kid feels self-conscious or some bully tells them they look stupid.
Be vocal about the things you love.
Express gratitude. Express joy.
Share the love.
Be a cheerleader.
And be your own cheerleader, too.
***I can be your personal cheerleader!***
If you need help getting started, getting that confidence boost, and figuring how to shift YOUR mindset and attitude, reach out to me here, or DM me on social media. I’m available now for 1:1 life coaching sessions at great introductory rates!